You're Now Leaving: Your Comfort Zone

Today I decided to disregard the weatherman, break free from the bonds of winter, and bust out my shorts for old time's sake. Despite the constant double takes and stares I received from the ever-so-proper Italians (although it might have been because my legs haven't seen the sun in 5 months) I was definitely happy with my decision. Something about not dressing like a nun makes me excited to go home! Although by wearing something other than a shiny black jacket and scarf I made it painfully obvious that I am nothing but a tourist, no one on the street today came up to me and asked me to sign something, asked me for money, or obscenely placed their hand on my ass (which was a nice change of pace from normal happenings around this city). That's enough incentive for me to continue looking like a tourista! Maybe I'll even add flip flops next time to add to the effect.

I've been having trouble concentrating lately and I think it's because the last class with my 6 year olds is tomorrow. I wonder how I'll feel- rushing off to the school after my morning class, frantically ringing the bell at the gate to be buzzed in, calming down Chiara, Neri, and Lavinia when they don't win BINGO; for the very last time. Ever. It feels so final. I know that the end to something always brings the beginning of something else, but I can't help but feel a little melancholy when I think about teaching those kids. I guess this is just the first goodbye of many to come and I'd better get used to it. Some other stuff needs to end too but I can't bring myself to do it.

Only 2 more months to go and then my parents will be picking me up at the airport. I know it sounds strange but I kind of want to live with my parents next year- not because I feel comfortable at home, not because it's the easy decision, not because I actually want to live under the same roof as my parents, but because I don't think I'd be able to handle going from walking past the Duomo everyday to living in Fullerton again. If I have to be anywhere I'd rather be in a place that I enjoy; a place that has more scenery than the Del Taco across the street from the Baseball Stadium. And while I absolutely lived for Taco Tuesday last year I'm pretty sure Ventura's Del Taco will have it too.

I just need to tell myself not to stress about it; that what's going to happen will happen without any help from me. Part of me is definitely a control freak and I need to let that go: in this, and in one main aspect of my life right now. Just relax! Trust that everything will be ok, and it will be.

Anyway. I need to make cookies for my class tomorrow and it's already 12:30. Past my bedtime! Nikki and the girls made me dinner tonight (hamburgers with mashed potatoes? yes please?) and we went out for a few drinks afterward. Definitely worth staying up, but I need to get to bed soon if I'm going to convince myself to go to my 8:30 class tomorrow morning.

Ciao for now.